Story For The Elderly

His name was Bob, he was a bin man. One day Jim woke up and made his way to school, where all his work mates were waiting for her. He all went to get some breakfast. When they had finished their dinner they made their way to the construction site. At first, Alan was fine, printing papers like he did every day, but then she began feeling all funy. It was that time of the month. Luckily for Hannah she only worked weekends so seeing as it was a Thursday there was no cause for alarm. On his way to the bathroom Mark was distracted by an advert on television: “One Way”. Turning his car back round and going back the way he came he noticed something strange; it was October. With this startling revelation Janice fell off her stilts and into the lap of an over-excited patron whose hands began to go south. When the patron’s hands reached the crotch and felt Paul’s penis he got very angry, and you know what they say “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!”. Infuriated, she grabbed John by the breast and threw him out of the window. Landing on top of a bus however, luckily, was second nature to Sandra and so she came out of the ordeal relatively unscathed, apart from a twisted nut-sack and ruptured womb. Once the helicopter reached it’s destination Fred let go of the pilot and strutted into the shop. “8 ciders please” She told the barmaid, before settling down with a woman in the Highlands. They lived in a small cottage before they got divorced and were forced to share the kids between the 4 of them. Our hero, Mick, was forced with custody of all 87 children. Unable to feed them all with only her 2 breasts, Jemima had little choice but to adopt 13 more and start up a circus. Securing the bank loan for the airport was the easy part, the hard part was where to put it: on the left or on the right? After settling on putting it North, Brian made his way up to bed and set his alarm clock for tomorrow, after all, It was gonna be a busy day at the White House…
-GaZZuM